Shorter Michael Scheuer:

The only thing that can keep this country safe from a spectacular attack by al-Qaeda would be a spectacular attack by al-Qaeda.

Alternative Shorter Scheuer:

We have to raze this country to save it. From being razed.

Seriously.  His argument boils down to this: if America isn’t attacked again, we as a nation will never do what it takes to keep America safe from being…attacked again. 

I know I’m repeating myself here, but the argument is just so magnificent in its self-refuting circularity that I can’t help but stand in awe.  Even Orwell would have left that scene on the cutting room floor, deeming it too much of a strain on the credulity of the audience. 

And yet, there is Glenn “Batshit Crazy” Beck nodding along as if these were the wisest words he’d ever heard.  His retort is brilliant in its own right:

Which is why I was thinking, if I were [Osama] that is the last thing I would do right now.

So, Osama wouldn’t want to screw up his chances of setting off a WMD in America at some later date by…setting of a WMD in America now.  I…but…the point is…he would…why is there blood coming out of my nose?

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