Camille Paglia writes for a living.  This is, complete, unedited, her opening paragraph:

Shuddering, lurching and stumbling, the 2008 general election has finally, mercifully begun.

Mercifully shuddering?

For a year and a half, U.S. voters have been flogged like a prison gang through the nine circles of media hell.

Flogging … a prison gang? … through hell?

The two dazed survivors of the primary process, John McCain and Barack Obama, are now warily circling each other, looking for an opening even as they try to shed the already hardened public perception of their character and motivation.

Survivors (NOT of hell’s whipped prison gang) circling … while shedding? … a hard … perception?

And … I’m tripping. If you make it to the “tornado alley of hallucinatory holograms” part, please close the doors of perception behind you. I don’t want the cat to get out.